Thursday, May 01, 2008

Cover Snark Xtreme--veinglory

In this new world of Poser zombies and stock photo model clones cover snark can get a little too easy to be considered sporting. So I would like to suggest a new category of Cover Snark Xtreme (cue the theme music). In CSX snark must be based on the potential for the cover art to contravene the new British extreme pornography law. That is:

An “extreme image” is an image of any of the following—
(a) an act which threatens or appears to threaten a person’s life,
(b) an act which results in or appears to result (or be likely to result) in
serious injury to a person’s anus, breasts or genitals,
(c) an act which involves or appears to involve sexual interference with a human corpse,
(d) a person performing or appearing to perform an act of intercourse or oral sex with an animal, where (in each case) any such act, person or animal depicted in the image is or
appears to be real.

For example. One Foot in the Grave has a nice cover. But once I got past it having the same title as a BBC comedy about post-retirement ennui and frustration, the ex-biker babe in me comes out. One can be a biker and dress like a babe sequentially, but doing so simultaneously is seriously ill-advised. Combine legs clad only in stockings with stiletto heels and a large motorcycle and this lady is engaging in an act that is likely to result in her ass and associated orifices making like mozzarella with the asphalt.

Is her defense that she is just sitting on the bike (ergo the risky act is not actually happening in this picture), unlike Peter Driben's vintage pin up gravel-rash-waiting-to-happen? But I am sure some of you out there can come up with more extreme cover examples, please let me see them!

Edited to add: How about this from Mrs G. Implied (d)?

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